The Fruits Of Insanity
by ilovekyosohma
Summary: The entire world of fruits basket shall go crazy, now that The Author Person has appeared to liven things up. and what will happen when she brings in people from other animes? who knows? not even The Author Person is quite sure what she's doing! review!
1. A CHAPTER! HAHA!

Spoiler warning: this is set apart from the story, but it has stuff from late in the manga, like pairings and Akito's Secret. So if you don't know, you might not wanna read this.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything. If I did, I'd be so happy, I would explode, and then it would end in the middle. But nothing has, so I obviously don't, huh?

Yuki, Haru, Kyou, Hatori, Shigure, Ayame, Ritsu, Hiro, Kureno, and Momiji were having a Guy Party at Shigure's house, while Tohru, Kisa, Rin, Kagura, Uo, Hana, Machi, Kimi, and Akito were having a Girl Party at Kimi's house. The guys were really bored. They had been doing NOTHING for the past hour. None of them got along very well…..well, SOME people were enjoying themselves, but mostly not. (the girls were having tons of fun. Except the Queen of Evil. Queen of Sexy Angst wasn't too happy either) they just sat there. They had turned on the TV, but had only found a bunch of black screens that read "we're sorry, The Author Person has turned this channel off for purposes either sinister or amusing, probably both" and of course they didn't think that was strange at all….right. anyway, suddenly Kyou attacked Yuki. Yuki just put up a hand to block him. Kyou tried again. Yuki blocked him. Kyou tried again. Yuki bloc-"hey, guys, that's getting boring, can you knock it off?" asked a very irritated Hatori. Kyou frowned. "one more time?" he pleaded. "no." said Hatori sternly. "just one more time. Yeah, that's okay." Said Kyou…..excpet he sounded like he was trying to convince himself. "I told you before, Ky-" hatori was cut off by: Kyou tried again. Yuki blocked him. Kyou tried again. Yuki blocked him. Kyou tried again. Yuki blocked him. Kyou tried again. Yuki blocked him. Kyou tried again. Yuki got punched in the face and went flying. Kyou tried-wait, back up a try! What was that? Yes, indeed, you read correctly. Hatori jumped up and ran around making everybody think the year of the rat had always been the year of the cat. It took him eight years, but that would be too long for this fic, so it took like three seconds. He got back and miraculously wasn't tired at all. Yuki got up. "wait…" he said slowly. "i…..lost????" he asked, disbelief clear on his face. "hehe." Laughed Kyou. Suddenly, a strange girl appeared magically. "HELLO!" she said (and yes, she said it in all caps) "why are you speaking in all caps?" asked Kyou. The girl looked at him. "YOU AREN'T SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT. THIS IS REAL LIFE, MEANING YOU CANNOT SEE MY CAPS. ALL YOU CAN DO IS HEAR ME SPEAKING LOUDLY." She told him. Comprehension dawned on Kyou's face. "oh, yeah. Why did I even ask that?" he asked. The Author Person(for yes, it was she) said this: "because you are a moron. Sorry, Kyou, I love you, but you act kinda stupid sometimes. Anyway, about the caps-I mean loud speaking, I was just kinda….eh…stuck that way. Hehe. Sorry. Anyway, since you are all so bored, I shall make things interesting for you. But how to begin?" said The Author Person, pondering her dilemna. Kyou and Yuki and Haru and-whatever, just look up. All looked at her. "interesting how?" they asked nervously. Ever since their last encounter with an insane Author, they were terrified of them. The Author Person laughed evilly. "MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA…hehehehehe..choke. anyway, we shall start by randomly bringing people in from other animes….and we shall begin with Full Metal Alchemist! Or to be more precise, two characters from FMA! MWAHAHA!" she told them. They were confused. "what is FMA?" they asked in unison. She stared. "oh wait, yeah you don't know cause you guys are in an anime too. Duh. I'm such a baka. Anyway, I'd like you guys to meet two of the hottest anime guys ever created: Jean Havoc and Roy Mustang. I'm sure this will be fun…" she said evilly.

Furuba characters: "uuuuuhhhh"

FMA characters: "ditto"

The Author Person: "oh yeah, I forgot someone…this is Riza Hawkeye. Because you've gotta love the Royai. Yeah, well, bye! You guys have fun!" she said, and then The Author Person was enveloped in a bright green poof. "ugh. I hate that smoke! Hey wait, I'm still here..why?" said The Author Person, emerging from the smoke. "oh, duh, I didn't say I left. I said '**enveloped** in a bright green poof' instead of '**vanished** in a bright green poof. Damn." She said. All the people stared at her. "ok, going now, bye." The Author Person **vanished **in a bright green poof.

"hi" said Havoc. Then he grabbed Black Hayate from Riza and ran into the corner. Yuki stared at him. then he wqent into another corner. Havoc put up a sign that said 'Dateless Corner' and Yuki hung one that read 'Girly Boy Corner'. Kyou ran into one that had the sign 'Unloved Corner' and the rest shoved Hatori into one that had 'Emo Corner' over it. He was held there by the magical Author Powers. And then the entire world froze, as if The Author Person had run out of ideas. Which, of course, she had, being lame. But then ever so suddenly, a huge voice boomed from above.

HUGE VOICE: "MWAHAHAHAHAHA! This is The Author Person speaking! I have had---you'll never guess—an IDEA!!!! Now it shall start becoming more fun!!!"

And then, a bunch of people appeared out of nowhere.

HUGE VOICE: "HAHAHA! Now it shall be interesting! Now we have—"

AN: but that will have to wait for the next chapter!! Yes, you must wait!!! But if you do not review, I shall throw snowballs at you with the snow that is actually outside right now!! So there! Review or face the rath of snowballs and pokes!!! haha!!!


	2. OMG, it's a another chapter

Disclaimer: I. do. Not. Own. Anything. Not even animals. Especially not chimera animals. If I had one of THOSE it would be a problem. I also especially don't own fruits basket. nope. Not fruits basket. Not basket. Not fruit. Not the two combined. Well, I may not OWN fruit, but I do have some…I have some fruits basket too….every volume.

Anyway, moving on. Ish including more of the other characters talking in this chapter.

LAST CHAPTER:

HUGE VOICE: "MWAHAHAHAHAHA! This is The Author Person speaking! I have had---you'll never guess—an IDEA!!!! Now it shall start becoming more fun!!!"

And then, a bunch of people appeared out of nowhere.

HUGE VOICE: "HAHAHA! Now it shall be interesting! Now we have—"

THIS CHAPTER:

HUGE VOICE: "HAHAHA! Now it shall be interesting! Now we have the girls, more FMA people, and MY SISTER!!! There! I leave you to your doom!!!"

The group of people consisted of The Girl Party, Winry, Ed, Al, and Envy, and my sister, who shall remain named "Vampyre" cause I feel like it, muahahaha, so there, oneechan! She can't say anything about it, cause I'll be publishing this before she knows I'm writing it, hehe. Anyway, I was writing a fanfic, wasn't i? back to that.

All the FMA peeps stared at Envy. "what is the Palm Tree doing here?" asked Roy.

HUGE VOICE: he's here cause I like him. Envy is my Deadly Sin, so I can RELATE to him. plus I wish I could shapechange like he does….

Roy stared at the sky. "are you sure it's a he?" he asked the Voice.

HUGE VOICE: of course. Ignore the skirt and it's obvious.

Envy looked at his skirt. "huh. Never noticed that. This skirt really does make me look like a girl, huh? Let's change that." He said, and changed the skirt into jeans and turned his shirt into a T-shirt. "better. I like it." He said. The Girl Party delegate, Tohru, spoke up. "excuse us. What in the world is going on?" she asked. Haru looked at her. "simple. We've been stuck in a fanfic by another of those crazy Authors." He told her. Tohru fainted in fear and was carried away by Kyou. Lurve. . Machi flung herself at Yuki in fear of the Fanfic Author. Yuki and Machi went to sit on the couch together while Kagura flung herself at Kyou and Tohru in an attempt to get them seperated. Suddenly Envy turned into Shigure and went sneaking into his room, while Winry and Ed were sneaking glances at each other. Haru got depressed and went Black and Rin felt sick and turned into a horse. Kisa was hiding in a corner freaking out and Hiro was comforting her. Everything was going along normally, like it always does. When suddenly!

The Author Person appeared! Am I using too many exclamation points?! Yes. Anyway, the author person looked at all the craziness and weird people and insanity and yelled at everyone to just stop!!! So they all did. "ok!" said The Author Person. "since we seem to have kinda got off the non-existent plotline, we had better have something interesting happen, and it had better happen really fast. For instance, I could marry Haru! But that's a personal fantasy and would not further the story if there was one. So what we are going to do, is we are going to turn Yuki into a rat and I am going to carry him around on my shoulder and have every person here state their first name, last name if they have one, and main daily activity so the people who have no idea who they are can get to know them better" proclaimed The Author Person. She seemed very proud of this idea. Yuki, however, was not. "and why do I have to be a rat exactly?" he asked with his eyebrows about halfway up his forehead in disbelief. The Author Person stared at him like he was a moron. "because you're Uber-Cute and Pocket-Sized as a rat, of course." She told him. he stared at her some more. While he was staring, she ran and hugged him. he, of course, turned into a rat. "haha, so there." She said evilly. Then she put him on her shoulder. " ok" she said, pointing at Haru. "you first!" she exclaimed excitedly. "err…why?" asked Haru. Then he thought of something. "hey wait, aren't you kind of obsessed with me?" he asked. She looked at him. "yes. So?" she asked, not understanding the question. Haru looked a little pissed. " well, then why is your penname ilovekyosohma? Keyword: Kyou" he asked incredulously. She smacked herself in the forehead. "I just never changed it. Anyway, you're supposed to be introducing yourself. Vampyre doesn't have to cause if I have her say something she might find derogatory I would be painfully punished." She told them with a shiver. Haru grumbled and went out in front of everyone. "hi,(mumblemuble)" he said unintelligibly. The Author Person glared at Haru "talk! Clearly!" she snapped at him. he grumbled again. "given name: Hatsuharu. Surname: Souma. Most common daily activity: whatever. School." He said, and stalked off. Except he got caught and squish-ed on his way past The Author Person. Hehe. "ok" she said, still squish-ed-ing Haru. "next is Kyou-kun" she said happily. Kyou just growled and stalked up. "Kyou Sohma. Trying to defeat that damn rat." He said briefly and stalked off the stage only to be tackled by Kagura. "ok. That was…short, but good." The Author Person told Kyou. "next we're gonna do an FMA person…..how about…Ed! Why don't you tell us about your life. Just make it, ahem..ah..SHORT…let's say..(snigger)" said The Author Person, and of course Ed freaked out. "WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SHORT IT WOULD TAKE HIM YEARS TO BE ABLE TO MOVE AN INCH!?!?!?!?!?" He yelled, going Ed-spaz again. She just smiled. "introduce yourself, bean." She ordered. Ed tried to freak out again, but The Author Person pressed a button on the Remote of Wonder and Ed was forced to introduce himself. Robot-style. "i. am. Ed. ward. El. Ric. i. spend. Most. Days. Search. Ing. For. The. Phil. Os. O. pher's. stone." He said. Al thought Ed was making fun of him and huggled his kitty and armor-cried. Then The Auth-TAP let Ed go and moved on to "Winry. You next." TAP said. Winry didn't really mind and went up. "my name is Winry Rockbell, and I mostly spend my time working on automail, mostly Ed's." she said, and wandered back off the 'Stage'. And then right when TAP was going to have Hatori-kun introduce himself, there was a HUGE EARTHQUAKE!!! No, I'm kidding, there wasn't really an earthquake. What actually happened was that Akito jumped up screaming and pointing out the window at something outside. TAP turned around to see what had caused the diusturbance. "oh, it's ok, we should be fine." She said, completely calm. "FINE???" yelled Akito. Haru and Yuki stared at her. "how can you say that? Do you even know what that thing IS??" they asked her, like she was completely stupid. Which she was, probably. But anyway. "yes, I do." She told them calmly. "isn't it obvious? That's a—"

This is my breaker thinger. What? I'm lazy.

Muahahahaha! It is a cliffie! Sort of. Although you most likely don't care. But anyway, review and tell me what YOU think it should be. I already know what **_I_** want it to be, but what do YOU think? I might like your idea and change my mind. Or not…


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